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Mummy can’t afford it

Walking through our local supermarket today my two year old gave the classic “I want that one mummy”about every item we walked past, he never throws too much of a tantrum (there’s still time I know) if he doesn’t get something, probably because he knows he has more than enough toys at home.

When an answer of “No”simply isn’t enough and he pushes by actually picking the item up (today’s choice was a Princess Peppa Pig) I reply with what I think is a pretty reasonable excuse for not getting him it “Mummy can’t afford it” this may not be every parent’s choice of phrase, but today I got a very obvious glare of disapproval by a passer-by and a passing comment of “Did you hear that? Why would you say that to your child”.

Well I didn’t respond to this stranger in person, 1: Because it really didn’t bother me too much, but just made me curious of people’s perception of right and wrong. 2: I have 3 kids under 3, I don’t have the time or entertainment to keep them still while discussing my reasons and 3: I have an irrational fear of stranger danger, even as an adult.

I mean what else am I meant to teach him? That I just don’t want to get him it? That’s not true, but I don’t feel guilty, he certainly doesn’t need this toy, I haven’t just refused him a quenching bottle of water when he’s thirsty. I’m not ashamed that I don’t have the spare money to spend £10 on a Peppa Pig figurine on a daily basis but it doesn’t mean he goes without.

I feel teaching him that all these luxuries cost money and sometimes you can’t have them is vital to him recognising the value of money, as he gets older he can earn money of his own if he wants extra toys that he has his heart set on.

So it doesn’t bother me that people look at me like a cheap-skate when I tell my kids I can’t afford to buy them something they obviously need, fair enough if I pull up in a Range Rover rocking the latest Michael Kors yet I can’t afford to buy a loaf of bread I’d expect some judgemental frowns, but I’m raising miniature people here, people I want to have respect for money as they grow up.

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5 Awkward Mummy Moments

Swearing

Walking down the street with a child, they are hilariously chatting away and you soak up passing strangers’ adoring smiles at the funny words he is coming out with “Then Billy said this and I said that and then Tom said… OH SHIT!”. Yep a 70 year old woman’s jaw has just hit the floor at a 5 year old dropping the S-bomb, then you cringe at the whispers “Well he must of heard it at home”, of course he heard it at home, it couldn’t have been the class of 20 other children he spends 6 hours a day with 5 times a week, but after that comment you can’t really fight your corner, just keep walking with your head down. Awkward……

Honesty

When a child asks why you can’t have Mcdonalds all the time because it’s so much more yummy than the vegetables they have at home, you explain that if you eat Mcdonalds all the time it will make you put on weight and make you unhealthy. So you’re stood in Mcdonalds, and trying to see the menu around the morbidly obese person in front of you, then they say it “That man must eat Maccy’s all the time because he’s really fat!” Ground just swallow me up now….Awkward!

Boobies

Breast feeding in public can be awkward at the best of times, some people will be disgusted, some will take a sneaky glance because they haven’t seen this phenomenon before, some will pretend they haven’t seen it and turn into a rigid plank of wood that can’t turn in your direction or they will burst into flames, some (usually kids) will giggle about that lady having her booby out, but there’s always that breast feeding cheerleader that will come over and be your no.1 fan, don’t get me wrong mine and Paul’s family will chat away to Mikey whilst he is on my boob, but they are family so it isn’t really weird, but when a complete stranger is within inhaling distance of your milk and rubbing your baby’s head whilst they are nursing, that’s pretty awkward!

Nosey Parker

Kids are nosey, they are into everything cupboards, drawers, bags, pockets, anything that might be the slightest bit naughty or exciting, they want a part of it! I like to think at only 18 months old Jack is quite polite in the way he is still a baby so he will take your keys out of your pocket, but he will hand them straight to you (manners cost nothing). Well this is all good practice, but you know when you can see a car about to bump into the one in front but you have no time to stop it and all you can do is wince as you hear the crunch of the cars colliding, well this is what it feels like when Jack goes up to a stranger in a cafe who is trusting enough to have her handbag on the floor next to her, before I can even shout his name never mind stop what is about to happen, yep… he pulls a tampon out of her bag and hands it to her….Awkward!

The non-pregnant woman

Teaching children that babies grow in mummy’s tummy is a lot for their brain to handle. So you make it simple, a mummy’s tummy has to grow really big until the baby is done cooking and is ready to come out, unfortunately some woman never lose their baby bump, or some may even appear to have one even though they’ve never been pregnant. To a child this is extremely confusing, or maybe it isn’t, they go up to a lady’s big tummy in the supermarket and say “When will your baby be done cooking”, then you laugh and jokingly apologise for their brashness and try to lighten the awkwardness by asking their due date, only to be met by the one comment you never want to hear “I’m not pregnant!” There are no words…not even awkward covers this one!