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Baby First Grooming Kit| Smilehome Amazon| A Review

Making sure you have everything in place for your little one’s imminent arrival is crucial, clothes, moses basket, nappies etc. It is all important to have handy from the minute your little one comes home, as is a grooming kit.

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Smilehome have created this handy kit for your little ones care needs, it’s perfect to have ready for your baby or to give to someone as a gift!

It’s a really classic set, it has all the essentials you need with a sleek modern design, in the kit you get:

Soft baby hairbrush

Baby comb

Thermometer

Nail Clippers

Nail Scissors

Nasal Aspirator

Cleaning Tweezers

Feeder Dropper

It comes in a beautiful box which is great to store the pieces in when you aren’t using them and again if you were to give this grooming kit as a gift the box is beautifully designed and shipped very quickly.

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Plus the pieces themselves have a sleek design and are made from safe silicone & plastic materials.

This is the perfect gift for a newborn or at a baby shower, or even just a nice essentials kit to buy for your new arrival.

Click here to check it out on Amazon.

To get a closer look, check out my video review on YouTube:

Smilehome Baby Grooming Kit Vlog Review

 

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PND | First Counselling Session | An Update

A few weeks ago I wrote a post about how my doctor had diagnosed me with Postnatal Depression.

I was referred for counselling and said I’d update you guys on my progress…so here it is:

I was given a call back and a telephone assessment, basically going over why I felt depressed. He also agreed I had “Perinatal Depression”, which actually covers more than just Postnatal Depression which means after birth, which is more accurate for me since my Depression first started when we lost our first baby.

We discussed my options and he thought 8 sessions of counselling would be a great starting point, at this stage the waiting list for counselling was 17 weeks! But because I fall into the “perinatal” category, I got moved up the waiting list so I was only 6 weeks away, but I actually had an appointment within 3 weeks, which was great.

I felt positive and happy to have taken the first step to help myself, which helped my mood to be lifted.

My first session nearly didn’t happen, the room was in a huge complex, hidden right in the middle around the other side of the building, so at first I went to the wrong reception. In my head this was a sign I shouldn’t go, I almost stormed off to go home, but I knew if I missed this session I’d be knocked off the list, so i fought my own mind’s negativity and although I was 5 minutes late, I found the room.

The counsellor was a lovely welcoming lady, I basically word vomited my whole life to her with all my anxieties and fears thrown in too, but she was great and didn’t make me feel silly for blurting it all out. She didn’t even need to say much, she just supported me in the decisions I was unsure about and basically told me that the way I am raising my children and living my life is OK and that I need to let go of the negative comments people make and just let them go over my head, she also thinks I’ve had a lot of trauma over the past five years of my life with losing two babies, Jack being really premature, my Dad passing away and a lot of other personal stresses that have caused me a lot of anxiety.

She thinks CBT will help me, once I’ve finished counselling. So I’m optimistic about that.

So my first counselling session went really well, I’m excited about my next one.

For those struggling with Depression who are thinking about starting counselling, I would say even after one session I feel more positive, it’s amazing the feeling that just making a forward step with supporting your own mental health can do.

There are so many options to help and support you if you feel depressed, you just need to take that step forward and the support is there, it isn’t a one size fits all and everyone’s story is different, but one thing that is true for everyone is that you should NEVER keep your feelings to yourself if you are feeling Depressed.

I’m keeping you guys updated to show how getting support for PND does work!

Here are some support links:

Samaritans

MIND

PANDAS

If you are in Lancashire like me this is who I get my counselling through:

Minds Matter

I will continue to keep you guys updated on my progress and if anyone wants to get in touch, share their success story or just to talk please comment or get in touch.

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Becoming a NICU mum

Becoming a NICU mum

This isn’t how it was supposed to pan-out.

We all anticipate how our babies will arrive and try to envisage that spectacular moment our little creation enters the world.

Then fate cruelly interjects and suddenly the dream bubble that’s been floating above your head for the past few months is torn in two and is replaced with the sound of beeping machines, the hustle and bustle of a busy ward and the reality of this tiny fragile human-being with wires and tubes protruding ever limb on their helpless little bodies.

It’s a massive shock to the system and you’re expected to just take it in your stride. As if becoming a mum for the first time or adding to your brood isn’t enough to take on board, now there’s the fear that this little part of you, won’t make it.

When they are born, that’s the helpless moment you lose the ability to protect your little one safely inside your body, the moment they leave your body, the responsibility then leaves you and is passed on to the nurses and doctors, which although we are grateful for, is heartbreaking, because all we want to do is cuddle our little bundles of joy and keep them safe in mummy’s arms.

With a “normal delivery” mum’s are so excited to finally meet their new addition, but during premature birth we have the fear of the unknown, knowing your baby may not breathe or be born with long-term health complications.

You would be judged for saying this isn’t what you wanted to happen, but I can’t quite understand why someone would pass judgement on the feelings of something they have no understanding of.

We don’t feel disappointment and sadness because this premature baby has become an inconvenience to our lives, quite the opposite.

It’s sadness for our baby and disappointment that this person we love more than anything else on the planet it having to struggle through the early days, weeks, months and sometimes even years of their life.

We call them fighters, because they are.

We call them miracles, because they are.

We wouldn’t change them because we love them in a specially particular way after being astounded by their strength….

But would we, if we had the choice wish they had never had to go through this?

Of course we would!

I look at Jack now, my waters went with him at 25+5 weeks and he was born at 29+5 weeks, spending 40 days in NICU and I’m still astounded by what he went through as a 3.5lb preemie. But the heartbreak of seeing my tiny baby squeal in pain with needle after needle, knowing his body couldn’t provide what he needed to keep him alive breaks my heart and I’d of taken it all for him if I could.

Nobody hopes to become a NICU mum, but once you are one, all you do is hope.

Hope that your little one makes it through the fight for their life.

I’m just one of the lucky ones my fighter made it through unscathed.

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Three poorly babies

I know Jack & Mikey aren’t technically “babies” but they are MY babies, so I have three poorly babies today.

It’s been starting for a few days but today it’s hit our household like a bacteria filled bomb, all three have sticky eyes (Yuck!), poor Jack woke up and thought he was blind! 🙈

Mikey has no comprehension of why I have to clean his eyes, he’s the hardest one to help. Jack doesn’t like having his eyes cleaned (using boiling water and cotton wool) plus eye drops, but he knows he needs them and if he just plays along it’s over a lot quicker than if he fights me, Nicole hates having her eyes cleaned (she’s too young for drops) but is too little fight back, so just gives me a guilty feeling with her bottom lip.

But Mikey, he is the strongest out of all three and hates any sort of intervention, wiping his nose, washing his hair, changing his bum…he’s not a fan of anything like that, so trying to swipe his eyes with cotton wool in one direction so I’m not rubbing it back into his eye, then putting in eye drops is near-impossible, but I managed it, I may have had to gently restrain him with my legs, but it took me no longer than a minute, whereas I could have sat there for an hour trying to reason with him but got nowhere, if you are a fan of the TV show Friends….Imagine Rachel with the eye drop, but x10!

I had plans to take the kids out to the park today or maybe even to a play area, but I’m not so well myself and really all they want to do is stay in their pyjamas and watch TV, so I’m not going to pass up the opportunity to chill with them and not spread this cold/virus/eye infection whatever you want to call it, to the outside world.

Kids perk up pretty quickly so I’m hoping they’ll be OK for nursery and a play date tomorrow, there’s really no way to tell until the morning with kids, they are pretty unpredictable. I know they’ll be absolutely gutted to miss out but I suppose it’s my job to decide what is best and weigh up the pros and cons, they’ve been having their eye drops for two days now, so hopefully their eye will be better by tomorrow.

I’m doing a video on my Vlog about my poorly babies, check it out and please subscribe

Yummy Mummy’s Vlog

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When the protective Lioness roars

As mothers, we have built in “feeling sensor” it’s when we get a feeling something just isn’t quite right with our little ones.

Even if they aren’t in the same room, building, town or even the same country, no matter how old we get or how old they get, it never goes away, when there’s something amiss we just know!

I have to say, sometimes it can be a bit off, I’ll have the strongest feeling something is going to happen or something is wrong, but in reality it’s fine, but I’d say I have a 70% accuracy for knowing when my little ones need me.

So today in a play area we go to quite a lot, I got the feeling.

Jack ran off on his own, as he does and I was sat in a place I could see all parts of the play area, so I could see him at all times.

I didn’t even hear him scream, I just suddenly got this feeling he needed me.

I stood up, to look at him…Jack was walking away from this other kid who was following him and hitting him, Jack fell to the floor and this kid started kicking him!

This all happened within a few seconds, I was there by his side within this time, but it felt like a slow motion lifetime.

I felt this rage in my belly, I can’t explain, but it was as if my inner lioness was roaring, like I needed to rescue my baby cub…

OK OK, I know it wasn’t that bad, we aren’t at war and my son’s life wasn’t at risk, but he was scared and being hurt by another person, all-be-it this kid was no older than 3, definitely around Jack’s age, but still when someone is causing your child to be upset, the feeling you get as a mother is indescribable.

If it had just been a “toddler smack” I’d of probably waited to see if Jack either “toddler smacked” them back or told them off (the more likely option from Jack), but I saw the fear in my baby’s eyes and this boy wasn’t hitting like a toddler, he was using his fists to punch, this little boy was obviously used to playing rough.

So before I had a chance to compose myself, or even think about it, I found myself hunched over in the soft play area telling a strangers kid he was naughty and he shouldn’t hurt other kids.

Was it wrong of me to call another person’s child naughty? Probably…

Do I regret it? Probably not…

Should I have just pulled my child away, comforted him and left the parents to deal with whether their child should be punished? I don’t know…but I know it was my instinct to protect my child and to show him that if someone hurts you it is NOT ok.

I know if my child was that intentionally cruel and hurtful to another child, their “play time” would be over and they’d either be sitting out until their siblings finished playing or we’d be going home.

Usually, I’d wonder if I’d overreacted, to how bad a situation was. But me and every other mum in that place were sat gawking at the destructive rampage this kid was on, even after I told him he was naughty and he continued to hit and kick other children.

I have to say hats off to the mum, she brought him over, there was a bit of resistance, but she relented and got her kid to apologise.

It is embarrassing, really we’re all in the same boat, with these tiny dictators trying to show us up at every opportunity, it’s always a worry if you’re going to have to face the “judgemental, snooty mum”, well that definitely isn’t me, I have three very normal, very cute but at times extremely irritating children, I’m in no position to judge…

I mean at the end of the day, they are kids!

They push the boundaries, that could have easily been Jack making another kid cry, sometimes he shocks me with how brutal he can be to his own brother, so I’m not one to judge. All kids want to see what they can get away with and I don’t think anyone is exempt from their kid misbehaving, it’s how we deal with it that counts.

So maybe I should have waited for the mum to come over, before telling her son off, but I know if that were Jack he’d be less likely to do it ever again if a stranger were to tell him

 off, it would terrify him, so I don’t think I’d thank someone for telling my kid off, but I think having the fear that someone, especially a stranger might tell them off, would prevent future naughty moment (we can hope).

But to be honest kids are pretty unpredictable, so they’ll probably just do what the hell they like whilst making us look like terrible parents at the same time.

I’ve diverged a bit in this post, I’ve been thinking about it all day, knowing I’d write it. To be honest I was pretty upset when it happened and I was angry that my son told me “Mummy I’m too scared to go back in” but throughout writing this piece, it’s put it into perspective, that we’re all mums just trying to raise our kids into semi-descent human beings, so instead of judging the mum and her son, I need to look at the bigger picture and not let my inner mama-bear take over before thinking.

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Calling Bullsh*t On Mum Shaming

Breast might be “best” but the truth is if formula didn’t exist a lot of babies would of died and if you lined a class of children up you’d never know who had been formula fed and who had been breast fed. You don’t know if someone has struggled breast feeding or if they just preferred formula and simply it is none of your business. Also when a breastfeeding mother does it in public it’s because the baby is hungry, believe it or not we do not find our leaking, engorged breasts being sucked on until they are raw as attractive, so no it’s not to “get our boobs out” it’s to feed our hungry babies. Just be happy that the baby is getting a full tummy, that’s all that matters. I’ve done both breast and formula feeding and now they both throw the same psychopathic tantrums.

Stay at home or working parent? I’ll let you into a secret, you don’t love your child more or less whichever you do, they’ll still keep you up at night, annoy the life out of you at times and cuddling them will make you forget all your problems for that moment. Judging someone for their working circumstances just shows a lack of experience in it. Children have long survived working and stay at home parents and either way they are going to grow into teenagers that don’t want to speak to us anyway.

Losing the baby weight. The reality is you’ve just created a human who has turned your life upside down, that is accepted. It’s accepted your house will change, your routine will change, your priorities will change…this is all accepted without question, yet your body where this little person has set up camp for 9 months is expected not to change! Shaming someone for their appearance at any other time would be considered bullying, yet we’re given unrealistic expectations on the front of magazines of how celebs have their 6 pack back a week after giving birth. So many mum’s beat themselves up for not dropping the weight as soon as their baby is born, you’ve just created a mini-person, give yourself a break and look at the bigger picture, you’d give anything for your child to be happy and content in their own skin, so why not be the person they learn that from, instead of society giving them an unrealistic perception of what is “normal”.

Time alone, really once you have children then there is no time alone, even when are sat in an empty house. Your mind doesn’t switch off from the minute they are born, ever! To any non-parents reading this, it isn’t as terrifying as it sounds, but the truth is in the back of your mind there is always a little worry when you aren’t with them, but you wouldn’t have it any other way! This however, does not mean that you aren’t human and don’t need a break from time to time and also that you are important and it’s ok for you to enjoy time without them there. The general consensus seems to be it’s ok for Dad to go down the pub to wind down, but if Mum goes on a night out and let’s her hair down then she is a terrible mother. Don’t get me wrong if you’ve left 2 year old Junior home alone with only the TV to keep them company, while you’ve gone out to get wasted and woken up in a police cell, then you probably don’t deserve mother of the year. But don’t be ashamed to admit you have another name as well as mum.

The truth is we’ve all got different children, so there isn’t one way to parent and really we’re all just fluking it in different ways.

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The time I knew everything about parenting

Before having children I knew exactly how many children I wanted, what age I was going to have them at and the age gap between them.

I knew how I would discipline them so they were perfectly polite, with no tantrums, they’d eat organically, never have sweets and everyday would be filled with educational sensory fun and strictly no TV.

As well as having perfect children, I’d be the perfect parent, I’d never lose my temper, always look presentable, the house would always be sparkling and I’d definitely never swear!

Pregnancy would be a doddle, I’d conceive the first time of trying, there’d be no stretch marks, my hormonal outbursts would be cute and I couldn’t wait for my “pregnancy glow”.

As you can see it was going to be pretty much perfect, I had it sussed even before the word GO.

There was just one problem, a snag that stood in my way, I bet you’re thinking what could possibly bring my perfect parenting plan crashing down?

Becoming a parent, that’s what!

There’s nothing that can quite show you how little you know, not just about parenting, but about who you will view the world than becoming a parent!

Not only does the textbook baby never show up, but neither does the textbook parent. Not only has this tiny person changed your day to day routine but they’ve changed the way you see the world.

Suddenly everything and everyone is much more frightening, suddenly you’re not the centre of your world anymore, you thought you knew how much you could love someone, think again.

I speak to so many parents who are devastated and guilty they didn’t live up to your own expectations, but let’s be honest those expectations were always unrealistic. There’s nothing wrong with that, the truth is no-one knows what to expect and if they do (like me) then they are wrong.

The guilt will continue (sorry to tell you) for the rest of your life.

Some of the expectations we put on ourselves and some are inflicted by others, fellow parents, the news, Facebook (that ones the worst), but the truth is if you’re keeping your child alive and if you love them and care for them, then you’re doing a good job, there are variations to how we parent but that doesn’t mean one is right and one is wrong, it just means we’re different.

So now as I sit here using my newborn as a plate for my sandwich while she sleeps, one of my boys is eating crumbs that he purposely crushed into the carpet this morning and my eldest is laughing insanely at a dinosaur app on my husband’s phone all at 9pm when they “should” be in bed. I think back to the time when I thought I knew everything about parenting and smile at how I thought that my expectations were what would make it perfect but now I realise the imperfect child and the imperfect parent are what really make it perfect and I wouldn’t change one snotty, tearful or stressful moment for the world.